'Cause nothing can compare in this world - to you

me mom called. me mom!!! muahahahaha :D it's nothing out of ordinary. tp sbb last week xblk kn ;) wa rase cam ade udang sbalik mee jek. ade la tuh mende nk suh wa buat! "kakde, tlg mak taip nih ye" =P tebkr wa!! ampon bonda! I luv u no matter what <3>

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Broken, this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you, so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I'd let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I'd let go, but there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one

Here I go, so dishonestly
Leave a note, for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I'd let go, but there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one

And with a smile I'll say my goodbyes

been QUITE depressed for the whole week. mak dia mmg cun! with assignments - mr. gerard LUV to give us so called EXERCISE every single class! sorta critical thinking Qs that we've become mentally challenged ourselves! (@_@) then hv to submit 1 journal per week for ms. sujata class (haven't submitted even 1 - been 3weeks now! muahahaha) ms. ct's class is starting to get tougher. and a MAJOR PROJECT that is so MAJOR I kinda intentionally forgot that I hv all those asgmts to submit.

seriously! rase cam nk bunuh diri pon ade =P but rite now, I'm juz DEADLY tired+sleepy to think 'bout killin' me self. y? had 2glass of nescafe last nite. been up all nite - preparing the presentation for my major project *keje last minit, sape suh!* during presentation td wa xnmpk muke panel² yg bijaksana kt dpn tuh. mmg nmpk double, seb baik ade meja kt dpn - bleh pegang. kalo x, jenuh nk ngangkat wa yg teletubbies nih :D kuangkuangkuang!

guess what! it's not as bad as I thought it'd be. present supposed to start at 9am. wa ngan yas pi awal, jumpe ms. ct dulu. dia kata slides wa ok. gile wa tekujat! then around 9.30 baru present. 1st group - not well prepared. xde slides, xde handout for panel. giler panel bantai sampai lunyai. wa ngan yas dh kecut ibu jari kaki! camni rupenye. ms. ct jeling kami - nk takut kn kami la konon!! mmg kami takut pon la =P

then yas present. panel lebih pasif dr previous presentation. diorg dgr sampai abih. then yadaa yadaa yadaa... revise proposal. then MY TURN! now that I think 'bout it, it's been quite a blur to me. a bit disoriented, ngantukz nk pensan dol! mata wa yg sedia kecik - makin kecik! when I thought wa pon kene bantai - TIDAK! muahahahaha mmg xsia2 wa stayed up all nite. sumpah a7x pon letih nyanyi teman wa sampai pg! ermm panel commented on my scope. quite big to be finished in 1sem. I'm thinking 'bout dragging it to next sem, so it will be my major project 2 (we are supposed to hv major 1 & major 2). so senin nih patut jumpe ms. ct lg. dgr dia bleter lg. tgk dia conteng proposal wa. then print it again =))

nobody said it's gonna be easy. yet if it's too hard, then nobody ever graduated, rite?! hah dh, wa kalo nk berfalsampah kt sini sampai sok xabih. la ni baru ade selera mkn. milo ais wa dh cair! afterwards wa nk qada' tido!!!!! uhh I still hv 3 articles summary & 3 Qs for mr. G, 3 journal for ms. sujata and 4 Qs for ms. ct *duh!* 1st things 1st! tido! g'nite all *looking at the sun still shining so bright*...

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I want a normal life
just like a new born child
I am a lover hater
I am an instigater
You are an oversight
Don't try to compromise
I'll learn to love to hate it
I am not integrated

Just call my name
You'll be okay
your scream is burning
through my veins

Sooner or later
your gonna hate it
Go ahead and throw your life away
Driving me under, leaving me out there
Go ahead and throw your life away

You're like an infantile
I knew it all the while
You sit and try to play me
Just like you see on tv
I am an oversight
Just like a parasite
Why am I so pathetic
I know you won't forget it

Sooner or later
you're gonna hate it
Go ahead and throw
MY life away
Driving me under, leaving me out there
Go ahead and throw
MY life away

Sooner or later
you're gonna hate it
Go ahead and throw our life away
Driving me under, leaving me out there
Go ahead and throw our life away

Am I being too obscure

haa! update on daily basis now? naah.. juz bored. besides I need to share this. there's a paper free for student available in my college plaza. so my housemate took one and saw an ads about reptilian exhibition in KLCC. yesterday she asked me if I wanted to go. Hell yeah! tossed my asgmt aside *no mood - altho' submission date is tomorrow!* & I got nothing else to do.

6 p.m kami kuar. CERDIK!! tau pon time org blk keje. stuck in traffic for like an hour or so. ujan lg, totally still traffic!!! kalo bejln kaki konpem sampai 5min awal =P anywayZz, dh park keta *biasa kt entrance tower record* xnmpk sebarang exhibition pon kt klcc. tanye akak receptionist - "kat aquaria dik". and what the h*ll is aquaria? gile kg siots! :D

another 15-20min walk *lenggang kangkong la* to aquaria/klconvention centre. and voila! aquarium full of fish?! ;- I thought we were there for reptilian exhb. admission fees:rm28 with myKad, rm20 with student ID *duh!* didn't bring mine. come a long way here, no turning back.
memule rase cam kitorg jek yg dtg melwt *btw abg jage pintu msk tuh ensem!* =P btul la ade reptilia nye. for this whole month of March aquaria buat menda alah tuh. atuk dia la besau nye ular!! 8-O kalo telan ank gajah blum tentu kenyang! jln punye jln msk part aquarium plak.

sampai 1 tank, amazon inhabitans. tiba²... jeng jeng jeng!!

atok dia cun laaa!! tekujat makde! 8-S 2 gigantic Arapaima Gigas swam across the tank. wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! I was like O_O :-O 8-O standing there in awe. literally held my breath *subhanallah!* watched 'em on tv b4, but it's juz like - ok that's big. but when it's really there in front of me?! U guys juz have to see these urself. nih kalo tangkap, buat mkn kenduri 3thn xabih nih *tsk tsk tsk*

then ade session bg mkn ikan dlm tank, by the experts. they are actually giving a chance to the aquaria's staff to dive along wif 'em. fun to watch! and guess what else in there? big bad sharks!!!! yup! the one wif those nasty looking teeth! *eii* Big one laaaaaaa!!! ade la sebesar 3-4 pemeluk. I was hoping they were gonna feed that shark. we were told that they only feed sharks on monday, wed, and saturday *better luck nxt time*

yg best tuh, wa bleh jumpe schoolmate lame. keje situh. ESTHER SHARMILLA THOMAS! hamik! name penuh. dia bleh tanye wa ingat lg x nama dia. we were friends since elementary skewl! she was the drum major for our band, I played that big drum *doom doom* then she co-conduct our choir in SMTK *I got the soprano - do re mi! - so did she* you are as tall as I can remember u la bebeh! nice seeing her again after this while. and I miss those time - band practising with cikgu fuad and choir singing, feud wif kuantan choir team =P

hmm still excited about yesterday's trip. too bad I didn't bring my vcam. kalo x, byk gamba dh amik :'( nevermind. nxt time plak. bleh ajak mak abah pi nih. kalo nk org tua bedua tuh ke kl. "sesak la. panas la" tehee :D tebkr dpn kaabah!!!! AMPON! later peeps...

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Lazy old day
rolling away
dreaming the day away
don't want to go
now that I'm in the flow
crazy amazing day

One red balloon
floats to the moon
just let it fly away
I only know
that I'm longing to go
back to my lazy day

And how it sings and how it sighs
and how it never stays
And how it rings and how it cries
and how it sails away

I don't care about anyone or anything - but me

back from class, like an hour ago. bored to death. it's raining outside. nowhere to go, dunno what to do *hello! you hv like gazillions of assignments to be submitted this week alone!* -_-' then I come across this quiz on bulletin board: http://www.blogthings.com/whatagequiz/

just answer some silly simple q's and it predicts your age thru the answers you give. me? this is what I got: ***You Are 18 Years Old*** You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. >:D muahahahaha that's not even close! I should've got 10 or less =P seriously! 8-S

okay i'm gonna do some googling & yahooing =P daa...

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Open up, it's revealed
Savor this
Don't get lost in the lie
Hit or miss
Whoa, beside
Myself
With doubt
Push on
What's to come will be proved
Focus bliss
Charcoal stares
One foot at a time
Smear those lines

It's what
I thought I found
What I always wanted
There with me
It's what
I thought I found
What I always wanted
there with me

Certainty
Is not at hand
I can't keep my eyes shut
You're taught not to listen

I got what I wanted
I got just what I always wanted
I got what I wanted
I got just what I always wanted

What I thought

And how do you know which way the wind blows

usually on friday, after class i'll pack my bag and go straight home *to me parents'*. but after a few too many complains *from my mom!* guess they won't see me as much as I want them to anymo' :'(

anywayZz! starting this sem, my school had a change of name - from MIT to Executive Leadership School *peh* new syllabus - well sorta. there's this Induscity *wtf!* so basically every friday they prepare us a slot - talks, talks and talks again. site visit only for year 1 student *let down!* we hv to wear something formal *my time to melaram wif baju kurung* ;) if only maRk was here - I remember last time, she'd be the one who we called "vouge de vast" muahahaha :D

this morning was the 1st talk, by Dr.I-don't-remember-his-name. I can say that I've juz got brainwashed! feelin' a lil' bit blank -_-' the talk was bout leadership *at least I remember the title* =P they showed pics of so called great leaders - bill gates, dell, honda, ford, yahoo & google founders, our current & previous PM, mandela, ghandi, fernandez - few others. boring! and the hall was so damn cold! fortunately I had my mp3 plyr on *shadows voice's alot sweeter than the speaker's in front* 8P~ I think all I can remember from the talk was "yada yada yada.. sorrow sank deep inside my blood.. yada yada.. you're all dead to me.. yada yada yada.. your integrity don't mean sh!t.. yada.. put a bullet in his back". ahahaha I was literally singing to myself at times!

"as the conclusion..." *woke up* at last!!! he needs to go for jumat prayer =P and I was desperately need to get out of that hall *can barely feel my hands - cold!* now here I am, in my room. dunno what to do. let see, i hv 3 assignments *argh!* 2 projects to think of *another big ARGH!* a few presentations *argh argh argh!* mr. gerard said he'd LUV to give us a test nxt week *aiyoo* - and my stomach is singing "feed me!" again =P that's it. 'til my nxt entry...

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Can't you see I'm easily bothered by persistance?
One step from lashing out at you.
You want in to get under my skin and call yourself a friend.
I've got more friends like you, what do I do?

Is there no standard anymore?
What it takes, who I am, where I've been, belong.
You can't be something you're not.
Be yourself, by yourself, stay away from me.
A lesson learned in life, known from the dawn of time.

Re, spect, walk.
What did you say?
Re, spect, walk.
Are you talking to me?
Are you talking to me?

Run your mouth when I'm not around, it's easy to achieve.
You cry to weak friends that sympathize.
Can you hear the violins playing your song?
Those same friends tell me your every word.

Is there no standard anymore?
What it takes, who I am, where I've been, belong.
You can't be something you're not.
Be yourself, by yourself, stay away from me.
A lesson learned in life, known from the dawn of time.

Re, spect, walk.
What did you say?
Re, spect, walk.
Are you talking to me?

Re, spect, walk.
What did you say?
Re, spect, walk.
Are you talking to me?
Are you talking to me?
No way punk!!!

Re, spect, walk.
What did you say?
Re, spect, walk.
Are you talking to me?

Re, spect, walk.
What did you say?
Re, spect, walk.
Are you talking to me?
Are you talking to me?
Walk on home boy!!!

This spot in hell's where I belong

bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.:maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.:maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.: bOsan:.:Lazy:.: maLas:.:boRing:.:

hah! now let's take a deep breath and... poot!~ (-_-') hee oops! i did it again :D muahahaha. well came back from me parents' this morning. I thought my class started at 11am so I arrived early. then I realized my class only starts at 1pm!!! wargh!! cam nyesal xtgk jadual awal² pon ade. so i hv 2hrs free. pe lg kn, MINES kn dkt =P pi la mines. gile awal wa pi, rase cam pi tolong bukak kn kedai plak *hehek* mule cari syampoo, kendian msk reject shop *sale* kendian msk kedai hot market. xle byk msk kedai pon. but i spent almost an hour inside reject shop alone!! muahaha rambang mata dol! seb la duit sket jek. kalo x, mau nye kedai tuh jd nani's shop >:D

btw, last weekend mimi spent sometimes here wif me. picked her up on friday at wangsa maju, sambil ronda² JJ jln² cari psl. actually she asked me to go wif her to her friend's wedding on saturday. so jumat mlm tuh melalau la kitorg cari jln dulu, takut pd ari kejadian kitorg sesat kn. nnt org lain dh sminggu siap kenduri, kitorg baru sampai. ape kes! =P mak dia cun aa!! mmg xnyesal la cari mlm tuh gak. ntah memane lps. ntah bape byk jln kitorg redah. adei la! dh letih menjerit² dlm keta kn, around 12am kitorg blk. letih! wa sempat lg membasuh (sok nye nk blk raub kn =P). mimi awal² dh tebungkang - 4am baru wa tido. bgn pg sabtu tuh mamai!! rase cam "bleh postponed x kenduri kawen org nih" ekekeke :D suke ati pak mnakan dia!! maka tgh ari brangkat la kami² skalian.

almost 3pm (lama sbb nunggu pengantin bersanding) kami pon blah. blk bilik dulu, touch up blk *muahahaha* pi dataran putra. saje menggatal, amik gamba. ramai org siots! ingatkn kami jek. dkt kul 7 kami blk kg. jam!! wargh!! singgah genting sempah. McD - idamanku selalu. ekeke lepak la barang sejam. lapar siots! sempat usha kain kurung kt tepi surau tuh. mata msg², eii! O_O tp usha jek a =P pastu nk dijd kn citer, minah seko ni salah tekan alarm keta. wa dh pesan bukak manual, jgn pakai alarm. haa amik! satu genting sempah begema! alarm tuh plak xelok. suke ati dia jek nk kejap idop jap mati. dkt kul10 baru gerak blk. rase nk pensan gelak. MIMI!! *heh*

on the way, kt lee rubber bpk mimi call. "jgn bwk lelaju - korg tuh pompuan". wak elah!! bpk dia cam tau² jek >:P lg mlm lg nk laju pakcik. seb le wa xmenjwb =P 10.30pm sampai. anta makcik ni dulu. wa sampai umah - tebungkang!!

duk umah mmg xbuat pe. dok diskus ngan mak nk shopping kawen abg ktne, buat bunga pahar kaler pe, baju camne. tsk tsk tsk! abg! pink kaler aa (pink kareeee!!!) ekeke wa nk ngat nengok abg besanding pakai kaler pink *tehee* tp dia xnk plak buat baju nye. pi mlk kami kaler unggu no. asik biru jek. biru mata itam kami!!!

orait, abih cite - for now. nk membazir mase donlod lagu. and i'm running out of space already! argh! or maybe search some new midi for my enset (found bat country last nite) *yay* later guyz...

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a wraith with an angel's body
a demon with a smile of gold
you soul sucker
i wont become like you

a killer with the perfect weapons
crystal eyes and a heart of coal
you soul sucker
i wont loose myself in you

look how pretty she is
when she falls down
and theres no beauty in
bleeding mascara

her lips are quivering
like a withering rose
shes back again

what the fuck do you think love means
its much more then words and feelings
sucking me dry
is my marrow that sweet
your dead lovers have left a trail of
broken hearts and misspent hopes
sucking them dry
does their marrow taste of sweetness, sweetness?
i hope you choke

look how pretty she is
when she falls down
and there's no beauty in
bleeding mascara
she's back again
she's back